I'm getting so good at purging, I can do it in the bathroom in my house! My sister's in the NEXT room listening to music on the laptop, my dad's on the phone in the living room, my other sister and mom are cooking in the kitchen.
Today was supposed to be the last day, but I think it changed to tomorrow. Because...
Being sick like this costs lots of my personal money.
I'm so numb, so numb... oh! That Linkin Park song I used to love so much. I can't believe how true it is. Sort of? Hm. Tomorrow I'm going to Santa Cruz. I daydreamed for so many years of the day I could wear anything I want, and feel really, really cute, pretty, skinny, and confident. For someone to ask me out on a date. Even though it's stupid. I'm so desperate to get matched (engaged) and to find THE ONE, but because of this stupid disorder and numbness, I had to tell my mom "no," for this time. It's this weekend. I couldn't.
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