Today... I hiked while listening to Christmas music (just for a little bit lol) with my best friend in the hills :) With my low energy and hunger, I would NOT have made it up the whole tortuous uphill alone lol.
Hm... I miss ballroom dancing :(
Mama warned me very harshly to start getting myself together and acting, and deciding as if I am engaged. Because it's true, I am as good as engaged. I realized if I did think like that, I wouldn't do some things that I have been doing. But I still cried in fear, anger, and pain when I realized what I would have to give up. And it's only to "protect" myself from other BCs and their parents. Sigh.
So I felt a wide range of emotions today, mainly happy, but ending with shocking, exhausting, burdening news. But... for the most part... I loved being able to feel again. Feel, feel emotions! I'm not numb anymore! I CHOOSE TO FEEL, YES!!!!! THANK YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOU :D
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